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Saturday 4 April 2020

Use Your Delusion

Well, it’s here at last. Use Your Delusion is now out.

The whole COVID-19 fiasco gave me plenty of time whilst cooped up at home to put the finishing touches to lyrics and music and record it over a couple of days. Let’s not pretend that an abundance of spare time has made this any better than any of my previous albums though – this is still as shit as you’d expect – possibly even shitter – is there a limit to the number of dashes you can use in a sentence?

Some things are different here though. There are 18 tracks for a start – I’ll talk you through them in a minute – which is more than any previous album. I was bordering on double album territory by having so many tracks, but the running time is only around 16 minutes, so you can almost fit it on to one side of a C90 cassette three times if you want. There are also no instrumentals – I really did draw a line under that with Why You No Like My Instrumental Shit? which, ironically, very few people liked.

So, let’s take a closer look at the tracks on what will most likely be the last ever Uke Hunts album.

One Last Time – yeah, this is terrible, as most opening tracks on Uke Hunts albums are.

I Like Pies – a very obvious nod to the Descendents. If you’ve ever heard their song I Like Food, you’ll see more than a few similarities.

I’m Not a Robot – frustrated by CAPTCHAs? Then this song’s for you.

Pine Barrens – yes, it’s a brief synopsis of the best ever episode of The Sopranos.

Blocked by Clarkson – a look at the world of social media, where I’m blocked by bigoted motormouth and car shagger, Jeremy Clarkson.

I’ve Never Been to Pontefract – entirely true, although I might not have been to all the other places mentioned in the song either.

There Are No More Instrumentals – an appalling a capella track. I recommend you skip it.

Skyway Robbery – have you ever bought food on a plane? It’s a rant about that.

Key Changes Are Shit… – they are.

…But Fade Outs Are Worse – they are.

Theft – spot the nicked riffs and win a fiver*.

The World is Knackered – a thoughtful environmental song.

I’ll Never Play This Song Live – maybe I will? Spoiler alert: I won’t.

Did You Know I’ve Also Written Some Books? – a song of self-promotion, but just so you know, all my books are available here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Tim-Jones/e/B01CDEHV5M

Alrighty Then – there just aren’t enough songs about Ace Ventura.

No Bodily Functions – you might have noticed a distinct lack of songs about having a shit.

The End – it actually isn’t because there’s one more track after this. I also nicked a bit of To Be Broken by Poison Idea for this song, not that anyone will know what/how that is/are.

Possibly the Worst Bonus Track of All Time – the title says it all. Just started recording and made some shit up as I went along.

*not really

So yes, this is the final Uke Hunts album ever. The joke has worn thin and, in all honesty, I never expected to get this far with it. If I’d wanted to go out on a high, I should have packed in years ago. But don’t rule out a greatest hits album or some live shit. I’ll still continue making music, but a different direction is required. I might even do some serious stuff.

As usual, this album is available on all good and some shit music streaming platforms.

Spotify:

Google Play Music:

Deezer:

At the time of writing it wasn’t on Apple Music yet, but hopefully it will be.

Go and have a listen so I can earn a few pence though.

Ta.

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